Day 47 – How to survive a broken leg (regardless of whether you play roller derby)

Here’s what. In two days my cast will be off and I’ll be placed in the freedom of a walking boot. It’s gonna be a minute before I’m skating again but you can be sure that those skate boots will be on my feet the day I’m allowed to live without a walking boot. To hell with the pain, the aches and the atrophy. I’m not kowtowing to any of it.

See, here’s the trick. When you break your leg, the most important thing you can do is acknowledge it and move on. Immediately. Don’t freak out. It’s just a broken leg and you will survive it. There is no reason to have a pity party, let the pain get the best of you, or be around anyone who wants to give you a sympathetic hug with puppy dog eyes and tell you all about themselves when THEY did whatever THEY did. GET HARD. Set up boundaries with barbed wire. Keep people away with a penchant for mania and drama. Use social media for FUN ONLY. The second you feel like posting some pathetic missive about how depressed you are, sign out of Facebook and read a Realbook. Lift your leg a lot. Don’t take pain meds if you can hack it. Own that shit – the pain is yours to master. It’s all in your head anyway, and the best thing about getting through serious pain is that you DO get through it. Just when you think you can’t handle it anymore you find yourself white-knuckling it to the other side.

Watch a lot of movies.

Document everything by blogging or journaling.

Make a list of shit you want to do and shit you don’t want to do anymore.

Congratulate yourself for a solid injury. A broken leg is badass!

When people want to do simple things for you, politely refuse their offer and do it yourself. You’ll feel better about it and it’s a really good way to figure out who’s normal and who’s mentally unsound. When someone is offended by the fact that you don’t want their help, mark them off your list – remember, keep the crooked minded at bay. You don’t need to be around the Debbie Downers. You’ve got enough work to do getting through the serious pain of a badass injury.

Recognize the difference between sympathy and empathy. Hang out with the people who have EMPATHY for you. Sympathizers tend to enable your pity party and then talk about themselves. They’re self-servers and don’t really care about you but they do apparently still need to talk about how bad their injury was. Remember, it’s not your job to take care of anyone else but yourself. However, be able to listen closely enough to discern if they’re offering you sound advice. Some people just take a long time to get to the point.

Get a solid crew of helpers and have a conversation with them to clear the air about your asking for help. Make sure they’re committed to your well-being and grocery shopping and don’t be an asshole about calling them. You have to accept the fact that you can’t do 90% of the stuff you did before you became immobile. With a crack crew, you get to avoid feeling sorry for yourself because you have people that will simply show up.

Don’t underestimate the power of Safeway delivery.

DRINK A LOT OF WATER.

Relax and be nice to yourself. Don’t worry about your diet. Eat the fried chicken and ice cream. Food is your friend and you deserve it. You can worry about shedding the extra pounds later. Besides, you’ll be the only person who notices the slight weight gain anyway.

If you’re on a league, work your ass off for them. You can’t practice and chances are you don’t much want to go and sit watching practices, so spend time studying your rule book, going to the bouts, watching derby on YouTube and diving into your committee work. Your league will love you for it and you’ll stay plugged in.

Listen to a lot of punk rock. Unless you didn’t grow up on that stuff in which case you’d just be a poser so listen to the hardest music that you actually enjoy.

Seroiusly – find the joy in your break. It has never been my experience in the last 47 days since my break that I’ve been bummed out about it. There are so many reasons to be grateful for a serious injury. Write a list and believe it. Don’t accept this as a bad thing, because it’s not. You will learn more about yourself than you had ever imagined. You will discover things you didn’t know existed about you. You’ll have hours to contemplate – take advantage of those moments and cherish them. This is why you need to do yourself the good turn of staying far away from people who make a big deal of your injury. These people probably want attention. Your injury is a big deal but it’s not a big SAD deal. It’s not a big HORRIBLE deal. It’s a big deal that you get the privilege of getting through it without succumbing to depression or hopelessness. Those are useless feelings. I promise.

Grab it and OWN it.